1. It has been a tedious week. What is your best advice to overcome self pity.
I will generally begin by making fun of you. Nothing makes me feel better, when I am down and out, than to make you cry. I am not a nice person.
2. What is your favorite Trivial Pursuit category (real or imagined.)
Real – Arts and Leisure. Imagined – Inside Roy’s head.
3. Would you rather turn into Sammy Davis, Jr. when masturbating – or-
have the AOL “You’ve got mail” guy announce your ejaculations?
If it means being a part of the rat pack for a couple of times each day, bring on Sammy. (there is a great joke, within the joke there. See if you can find it.)
4. What do you remember about your first day of school?
I remember smiling and of course napping. This question brings back two memories, that of the first day of kindergarten – I am quite certain my fav memory from that day is the discovery of the cute little storage bins for hats, coats and fun little kindergarten gluey things. The second memory that this question triggers is the first day of first grade – and my fascination with the desk and the school supplies we were told to bring with us.
5. When was the last time you sat on a park bench? Describe the event.
I went to the museum on Monday, only to discover that the museum was closed on Mondays. While traveling back to the light rail, I walked through Civic Center park, which had many park benches. However there were also a lot of drug dealers and crack heads, so I made haste in my dash and passed up the chance to sit on a park bench and complain about my sciatica.
!) I don’t typically succumb to self pity but if I did, I’d probably cozy up with friends, have cocktails & dream about the weekend.
Today has been the pinnacle of a tedious 3 weeks. Why just this morning I watched a man kill a rat on the subway platform with his foot. I couldn’t say anything at the time but thinking back, I would have liked to have said, “You know, I bet you’ll kill a person at some point in your life.” I believe that would have made me feel much better. Currently, I just want to drink the memory away…
@) My favorite Trivial Pursuit category is Music which I’m certain is to anyone who knows me. It’s my favorite because it’s the only subject I actually know things about in quantity.
#) I’m going with the AOL announcement because I think it would be a hoot to others riding in the subway car with me. Granted, I would need to ejaculate on a train for this to happen but I dream of simple things to make myself giggle.
$) I don’t remember anything about my first day of school. I think I’ve repressed my school daze so much that the memories are lost forever. When it comes to junior high, that’s a very healthy thing & I’m certain the anger & pain I felt won’t seep out in unhealthy ways.
%) I last sat on a park bench on our last excursion through Central Park after visiting the Natural History Museum. Thom & I are avid people watchers & in New York City, we’re never starved for entertainment. There was an elderly lady who had to be helped to sit next to us, a woman walking by who didn’t know that new money doesn’t mean you can dress in an inappropriate & tacky manner & an enormous man in sweats walking his Chihuahua. Additionally, it was January & 70 degrees outside so there were people EVERYWHERE.
My favorite park bench moment was in the Sexy Park in the East Village over the summer when Thom & I Just sat there & watched half naked men oil each other up & down to bask in the radiant glow of the sun. YOU’VE GOT MAIL, indeed!
1. It has been a tedious week. What is your best advice to overcome self pity.
sleep. Only sleep gives me a fresh outlook on stuff. Sometimes I lie in bed with regret, sometimes stupid stuff… sometimes heavy stuff. In the morning, all is forgotten and my hound dog ‘Rufus’ is usually licking my nose. That is Rufus up above, instead of a mandala. You can’t be mad at the world or yourself when a puppy is licking your nose to wake you up. You can, however, be mad at the Rufus
. 2. What is your favorite Trivial Pursuit category (real or imagined.)
Well, Tom, I have to go with an imaginary one here. Rock & Roll history.
3. Would you rather turn into Sammy Davis, Jr. when masturbating – or- have the AOL “You’ve got mail” guy announce your ejaculations?
the second one, because Sammy Davis had a glass eye. I can’t masturbate to that. What if he pulls it out and tries to show it to me (the eye, I mean)?
4. What do you remember about your first day of school?
Strangely, I remember it quite well… even though I don’t remember hardly anything after that. It was the first day of kindergarten, so I was about five. My mom took me and I begged her not to leave me there. I was convinced it would be people being mean to me and huge amounts of homework to keep me from my family and TV. You say ‘but how would you even know what homework is if you were 5’? I have two older brothers, whose mission was to destroy me. I think we all had a bit of fun, in retrospect.
5. When was the last time you sat on a park bench? Describe the event.
Central Park, NYC… a couple of months ago for Thanksgiving. The wife and assorted fam went to go ice skating in Central Park. Because I was in between knee surgeries, I could not indulge. So, I did some wandering and some bench sitting. It was a fine fine day.
1) Sugar and Spice and…well…all the Spice Girls actually.
2) I rule in Entertainment
3) I have always wondered what it would be like to be Black, have a glass eye and be Jewish…and to throw in having it happen while jerkin’ the wonder weed, well nothing could be finer…
4) Good touch…bad touch time.
5) Actually in a Park? Hmmmm, I suppose it was that time with more good touch…bad touch.
1. I can overcome self pity by a recently discovered new show called “Happy Friends.” Self pity and loathing melt away with the death and dismemberment of cute tiny animals.
2. Science (if that is one). My pretend one would be who’s who in Roman Catholic Theology.
3. Since I’ve already been masturbating for years to AOL “hot” members, I’ll go with Sammy for something new!
4. I’ve several first days of school memories, my first pre-school, my first kindergarden, my first junior high, my first high school, my first college, my first graduate school, etc……my favorite is my 1st grade where on my way to school I dropped my glasses jar of “lunch money” in the parking lot and thusly starved for a day, with tears to flavor my bitterness.
5. I too joined mister Edwards on the Bench in Central Park, warm and truly delightful! Mmmm men in NYC are so damn cute!
1. I’m with Edward on this one. I go for avoidance techniques that include friends and booze.
2. Real: 80’s Entertainment (1980’s Edition). Imagined: Historic Eddie Hairstyles (Eddie Edition).
3. I’ve got mail!
4. I cried and begged not to be left behind. I believe I told my mother that it was “mean” of her to do that to me.
5. I believe I was in London, and I sat down to catch my breath while attempting to get at least one decent picture of the Tate.
1. Drinking heavily and sex. O.K. drinking.
2. It used to be geography but that category in the new editions has become quite difficult. I would have to say now it would be sports or music.
3. I think the AOL guy would be most interesting. Kind of like Stephen Hawking having sex.
4. My mom was 9 months prego with my little brother so my grandpa drove me. I would not get out of the car so he just drove me home. Sweet. My first day of school and I played hooky. Maybe a sign of things to come.
5. It has been so long I cannot remember. Lame. I am going to go to the park today to remedy this.
1)making fun of the retard that bags my groceries and yelling at her for doing it wrong and not doubble bagging it!
2)T.V. and Movies
3)would the AOL guy have to follow me around all day or would it be recorded? Ah who am I kidding Sammy’s the man!
4)Cookies!
5)I sat on a bench the other day with one of Roy’s public inebriate friends waiting for the detox van/great white hope to arrive. Had a great conversation about the inequalities of life.
Have to give it to Greg for his answer to #1, but diet 7-Up through nose from snort laughing is fairly painful.
Thanx for the props I didn’t think anyone but me read other peoples responses. GB
1. I’ll let you know once these aching corns of mine finally get my tired back from my low-paying job to my small over-priced house. But don’t mind me, ho-hum, I’ll manage.
2. Real – Science & Nature. Imagined – “Die Hard”, candies & foods on sticks.
3. Since Sammy D is deceased, well, I’ll have to pick him, just to see what happens.
4. The feeling that I was going to rule that place.
5. Monday I went to the staff orientation at Caltech, while on the architectural tour of the campus I slumped into a bench near one of the reflecting pools or fountains or God known which of many zillion turtle ponds – I hope there’s not a test.
Actually YukonD, with Sammy being dead, I think his scenario would be more like having sex with Hawking.