thisiswhatyoushalldo

You have a putt-putt golf course and get to design/name the first five holes – what are they?

1. Trump’s golf course has a par 17 and comes with a mini golf cart to travel every two feet for the next shot.

2. NRA gun store – a par 75, but you must use an AR-15 to get the ball into the hole.

3. Petting zoo-palooza is An easy par two but you get all distracted because it is filled with adorable baby goats and sheep who just want to cuddle.

4. Comet Ping Pong Pizza – you have to use a ping pong paddle to negotiate the ball through various pizza ingredient diversions.

5. Kayak water ride. You put the ball in a mini kayak then have to float it down a mini river diversion to get to the hole to score.

1. Today’s my birthday – when is yours?

The great part of birth on May 26 hovers near or lands on Memorial Day weekend. It is always a four-day weekend for me.

During the Star Wars era, Dad would load up the family car, and we headed to Denver to watch the original trilogy. I remember my birthday weekend in Denver watching Star Wars: A New Hope (However, it wasn’t referred to as New Hope yet.) We saw it at the Continental Theater on Hampden on the big 70 mm screen, and it was glorious.

2. You’re given a chance to irreversibly rewind time back to the date of your tenth birthday, but you need to decide within the next 30 seconds. Do you do it? Why or why not?

Oh, certainly. To relive the 70s and 80s all over again and be given a redo – absolutely sign me up.

3. What’s the worst birthday gift you ever got?

Nothing really comes to mind but probably from my grandma. She gave odd, overly practical, no-fun gifts.

4. When people sing happy birthday to you, what are you supposed to do?

I clap along, as it is probably uncomfortable for many other folks singing along.

5. You have the genie wish granted that allows you to fill the pinata with whatever you want – what is in the pinata?

Cash. Tons and tons of cash in large denominations.

1. Without saying your city’s name, what is your city’s best band or artist?

Most famous current – probably Nathaniel Ratcliff
Most famous – Phillip Bailey (Earth Wind & Fire)

2. What is your favorite one-hit-wonder song?

“Let it out (Let it all hang out)” – The Hombres

3. When you walk into a room, what theme song should start playing?

The Dick Van Dyke Show theme song.

4. What food aren’t you eating even if it was free?

Haggis

5. What’s your favorite card game?

A family card game called Nine Square. When the family gathers this game is usually ongoing and playing all the time l

1. What is the best time travel movie?

“Time After Time” H. G. Wells uses his time machine to pursue Jack the Ripper into the 20th century.

2. What’s the most terrifying movie you ever watched?

I am not much of a horror movie fan but, I went into “The Salem Witch Project” at a packed movie theater having known nothing about the film, and it scared my socks off.

3. What are your favorite movies of the 21st century?

I have mentioned this on the blog before. but I was quite taken by the Banshees of Inisherin. A quite charming quiet film.

4. What are your favorite Gene Wilder movies?

Dr. Frankenstein and The Frisco Kid.

5. If your life was a movie, what would it be like?

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

This week we are leveraging the “Colbert Questionnert”

1. Best sammich?
Lono will agree – Jerry’s Philly’s Cheesesteak joint down on Lincoln and Oswego. Now closed, but this man was indeed a sammich artist and had a love of crafting a perfect sammich in every bite. And he would talk and entertain as he made his hot beef and cheese concoction.

2. Apples or oranges?
Default to apples, but I really like oranges, but they mess up my blood sugar.

3. First concert
Stella Parton performed at the Ride ‘n Tie Days rodeo in Craig, Colorado, when I was about 9 years old.

As an adult – The Rolling Stones at Folsom Field in Boulder in 1981.

4. Ever asked someone for their autograph?
Yes, Al Franken when he was visiting our building when I worked at a newspaper in Denver. He was a college friend of our building owner who also owned Journal Graphics that did transcriptions of CNN in the old days Al was studying the coverage of the O.J . trial and visited, and I had a chance to meet him and get an autograph.

5. What happens when we die?
Worm food, then you turn into a dog.