Wacky Friday Fotos

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A fan of the Netherlands holding a mock World Cup trophy cheers before the start of the 2014 World Cup round of 16 game between Netherlands and Mexicoat the Castelao arena in Fortaleza June 29, 2014. REUTERS/Dominic Ebenbichler (BRAZIL – Tags: SOCCER SPORT WORLD CUP TPX IMAGES OF THE DAY) ORG XMIT: DEL109

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Friday Fives

1. If you were a cult leader, what are some of the things your cult would believe in?
The entire cult would be centered around creating a new utopia based on left-handedness and readily available fresh raspberries. Unfortunate right-handers who are coerced into joining the cult would be forced into a left-handed centric worldview. Lefties, by their very nature, would be elevated to positions of power in our gorilla shadow world government.

2. If you started a new sport, what would be some basic rules and the point of the game?
As a rather clumsy sporty sport sort, my new sport would be centered around marbles and those fancy Jai A Lai glove mitt things. And no base running but instead more of a dartboard style scoring system.

3. If you invented a new fiction genre, what would it be?
Left-handed presidential autobiographies.

4. If you invented a new food craze, what would be the basis?
Raspberry fritters.

5. If you founded a new country, what would one of the tenants of your new constitution?
Corporations are not people!!!!

Friday Fives

1. Lot’s of death and bad news this week. What’s something good that happened this week?
I’ll take an easy shot and say that the Capitals winning the Stanley Cup was some good news for the week.

2. It’s a good day when . . .
There is lot’s of fresh coffee and lots of ice in the fridge.

3. What’s the best feeling you have ever felt?
Landing at Stapleton airport on my return home from the Army and seeing my family waiting for me at the gate.

4. What cheap (< $20) guilty pleasure can turn a bad day into a good day?
A hot slice of pizza.

5. Do you have a best “Dad” joke?
Q: Why don’t you ever see any elephants hiding in trees?

A: Because they are really good at it.

Friday Fives

1. It’s already June, for crying out loud! What is your earliest summer memory?
“I have some fond memories of walking to the county library and checking out books and participating in the annual summer reading program. Also some deeply ingrained memories of going to the county fairgrounds, for both the fair and for the weekend quarter horse racing. My dad was on the county’s racing commission and he usually towed me along as a kid while he was setting stuff up or taking part in running the parimutuel betting booths.

2. what’s the stupidest thing you’ve done as a kid over summer vacation?
It probably involved something we would do playing down by the creek along the creek bed Lots of hours were spent there and it wasn’t necessarily a safe place.

3. Do you have any summer traditions?
I think gathering to watch triple crown horse races at a tavern somewhere, although this year, I am way behind the curve. Either that or taking in a show at Red Rocks.

4. What did your summer look like 15 years ago?
So, hmm, 2003. This was pre-blog, pre-Gmail. I am certain there was a camping trip or two (Gunnison/Buford?) I would have been 39 years old, so no major birthday stuff that I can recall.

5. What do you hate about summer?
Paying the electric bill due to running the A/C.

Friday Fives

1. Are you an active collector of anything?
T-Shirts, I guess. I have amassed hundreds. But I haven’t bought a new one in months if that counts for anything.

2. If you could quit your job and pursue your hobby full-time with financial security, what hobby would you pursue?
Baking. Opening a French bakery and making wonderful loaves of bread all the live long day.

3. What’s the gateway drug for your hobby?
For baking, I would say it is learning to make beer bread. Basically dumping and stirring and baking. Yum.

Beer Bread

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees

3 cups self-rising flour (sifted)
3 teaspoons baking powder (omit if using Self-Rising Flour)
1 teaspoon salt (omit if using Self-Rising Flour)
1?4 cup sugar (sifted)
1/2 T Vital Wheat Gluten (sifted) (Optional but will help keep it together and not make a crumbly mess of a loaf.)
1 (12 ounce) can beer (just about any style of beer works and each variety gives the loaf a different character.)
1?2 cup melted butter (1/4 cup will do just fine.)
(Sifting the flour is a must do. This can be a brick of a loaf without sifting. Sifting gives it more of a cake-like texture.)

Sift all the dry ingredients into a mixing bowl and stir it up to incorporate all of it. Then slowly add the beer and stir until you have a sticky batter.
Generously grease a bread pan (if you have glass it seems to work the best.)
Pour the batter into the greased bread pan.
Pour the melted butter over the top
Bake for one hour.
Carefully remove from the pan and let cool on a bread rack for about 30 minutes

Slice and eat.
This is amazing toasted.

4. What one thing were you 100% into but now have no interest in?
As a kid I was into stamp collecitng and still have my binder of stamps but I am not an avid collector anymore.

5. What’s the weirdest hobby or interest you have heard of?
Oh gosh. Where to start. With the world of social media, you can find all kinds of things. I think my favorite is the guy who works at getting into the back ground of live camera shots as a hobby.

Friday Fives

1. What is the TL;DR of your favorite book?
The whale is an allegory for the elusiveness of the meaning of life, just outside of Ahab’s reach.

2. Do you listen to Audiobooks? If so, why?
No. I have tried but I can’t get hooked into the narrative.

3. Who should definitely NOT be narrating children’s books?
Kevin Spacey – with what we know now, it would be just too weird.

4. What would be some good books for a 12 or 13-year-old boy could pick up and then learn to love to read?
Harry Potter of course. And maybe some solid science fiction, like “Ender’s Game.”

5. What’s the most disturbing book you’ve ever read?
The Painted Bird by Jerzy Kosinski. There is a terrifying rape scene that unfortunately stays with you for a while after you read it.