An exerpt taken from an article in Hawaiian Tourist titled “Famous Brass Balled Monkey Shrines in Hawaii,” written by Stephanie Zimbleist, 2006.
Ted demonstrates how he massaged the famous Giant Brass Balled Monkey Shrine he visited when touring brass balled monkey shrines in Hawaii. Following hundreds of years of brass balled monkey shrine tradition, Ted rubbed the brass balls while on his knees. “Rub the brass balls long enough,” he said, “and a deep sense of euphoria and purpose envelopes you, as well as a delightful shower from above. That shower is an engineering wonder of the ancients, not to mention, it feels great!” When asked if the balls were hairy, he laughed, saying, “Those brass balls have been massaged for hundreds of years by thousands of people! They are as smooth–that is, they’re hairless–as mine!”
Ted Haggard illustratese how he spent most of his vacation at the Long Yang Club in Honolulu.
*illustrates*
Arnold Scwartenzegger kneels at the visage of skynet in human form – Nancy Pelosi
According to those who knew him best, Pastor Haggard was a lousy lei.
Eddie – gold clap. More than just funny, but a few types of disgusting as well.
Huzzah!
An exerpt taken from an article in Hawaiian Tourist titled “Famous Brass Balled Monkey Shrines in Hawaii,” written by Stephanie Zimbleist, 2006.
Ted demonstrates how he massaged the famous Giant Brass Balled Monkey Shrine he visited when touring brass balled monkey shrines in Hawaii. Following hundreds of years of brass balled monkey shrine tradition, Ted rubbed the brass balls while on his knees. “Rub the brass balls long enough,” he said, “and a deep sense of euphoria and purpose envelopes you, as well as a delightful shower from above. That shower is an engineering wonder of the ancients, not to mention, it feels great!” When asked if the balls were hairy, he laughed, saying, “Those brass balls have been massaged for hundreds of years by thousands of people! They are as smooth–that is, they’re hairless–as mine!”