1.What was your latest complaint?
Bad drivers in a snow storm who can’t control their cars. Grrrrrrrr. It is snow. It is ice. The conditions change. Don’t drive like it is a sunny July afternoon!!
2. What was your latest compliment?
My boss told some peers that I was very, very good at giving effective performance feedback to challenged employees.
3. Would you rather . . . have skin that starts to melt when exposed to temperatures above 45 degrees – or – have your hands contantly moving as if playing speed chess?
I go with happy, fast hands. Imagine the ability to get the stuff done super quickly. I could knock out a major salad in minutes.
4. Who was the bully on your playground?
I don’t recall in elementary days, but in middle school, our town was going through a major construction boom at the mine and the steam plant. As a result there were lots of new kids, it seemed like every week. And invariably one of those new kids was always trying to be the school yard bully and challenging kids to fights after school. As I recall, the cowboy types always seemed to win in the end.
5. Is the job you have now anything like what you imagined as a kid?
Not at all. I manage an inbound call center
!) My latest complaint is: “LET’S KEEP IT MOVING, TOURISTS!”
@) Rusty (a coworker of mine) said on the phone this morning that Thom & I make a very handsome couple.
#) I’m going to take the melting skin because I don’t care for heat. Having a medical condition forcing me to move somewhere cold would be divine!
$) I have no idea who the bully on the playground was. I didn’t really interact with other children on said playground as I was too busy reading off in a corner somewhere.
%) The job I have now is almost what I imagined as a kid. Initially, I wanted to be a megastar like Madonna & then it morphed into an indie rock star. Now that I’m here & learning more about the industry, I think I’ll stick to working behind the scenes…
1.I probably complained about the incompetence of co-workers. I complain at work so much (not to anyone in particular), that it’s become as natural to me as breathing.
2. It was probably something to do with me being scorching hot and amazing in the sack. Probably.
3. That’s easy. With a core body temperature that’s more than twice the 45 degree threshold, you wouldn’t be able to stay alive very long if you had melty skin. Your body would be in constant battle with its largest organ, so this option is wholly infeasible. Thus, I’ll go with fast hands. Think of all of the typing I could get done. I could get a second job as a clerk typist.
4. In elementary school, our bully was a skinny-yet-menacing kid named Brad Sweeney. I don’t recall him ever getting into any fights, but he was poor and scrappy, and carried himself as if he could kick some ass.
5. Nah. In fact my profession is so far removed from my idealistic teen/college years that it’s amazing. I used to loathe running into tie-wearing, catchphrase-spewing, Audi-driving yuppies in bars. Now I’ve become *that* guy, and actively seek out others like me. Eh. . .it’s a living.
1. ummm…i have so many. lets see…i guess i would have to agree about the lousy winter/snow drivers. its really pretty infuriating to watch these assholes try to operate a vehicle.
2. probably something about my ability to form complete sentences.
3. i would say the hands is the better option, mainly because melty skin sounds like a mess i dont want to deal with.
4. me.
5. no, and i had better get a move on if i’m going to ever be a wide receiver for the denver broncos!
1) The inheirent evil in most corporate entities.
2) My what big hands you have.
3) Hands.
4) To answer this I would have to go dig up the body and get CSI to identify the remains. Seriously, I don’t know Reid, but if he says he was the bully…then my answer is him.
5) Let’s see…ummm, no. My quest to be a superstar ended after the suspicious accident.
1)Complaint – there’s never any food in the goddam house. I buy it, I put it in the fridge and some in the cupboard and yet there is always one sip of OJ and chip dust when I’m hungry.
2)I don’t give many of those and, hence, I don’t get many in return. I try, by saying something like “That’s a great hat” but then I immediatly think, now this person is going to try to hump my leg, so I better counter it, and throw in “Where do people with your head size shop?”
3)So wait, my skin melts and I carry it around in a bucket or it just runs down my couture & is forever lost? If I could walk around all skully and muscley I think that would be pretty cool, but if I had to keep regenerating skin only to see it vaporize, well that, like K-Fed, is just a waste of perfectly good epidermis.
4)This is like asking who the weirdo on the bus is… if you don’t know immediately, you’re suspect.
5)Let’s see, I get to work whenever I drag my body out of bed. Ride my scooter here just in time for tea. Work for a bit, then we all have lunch in the garden. Not to mention I work with famous astrophyicists and Once a week we have tea & cookies before a talk in the late afternoon. Minus a purple unicorn as my secretary, heck yeah it is.
1.) A certain doctor bitching about being “busy” with a 3 patient load while other docs ( namely the fellows ) have a 12-15 patient load. That’s “almost” as lazy as my last job………
note: a “fellow” is an MD appointed to a position which grants a stipend for advanced study ( in this case Oncology ). Usually a 3 year gig, after which they can sit for the oncology boards.
2.) If you find Ryan Seacrest attractive, then my last compliment was a few days ago ( seriously, I get compared to him on a WEEKLY basis ). If you find him not-so-attractive ( Edward ) then my last compliment was a week ago when practically everyone in my office said I belonged on the cover of GQ ( I WAS wearing a very kicky outfit and my hair was exceptional that day ). Bear in mind, these folks all have kids and their idea of high fashion is something without baby puke on it.
3.) I enjoy the warm weather so this precludes me from the melting skin option. Besides, Eddie is right. Our body temp is twice that of 45 degrees, making this a really stupid question.
4.) His name was Richard Root and he used to extort Star Wars figures from me for some time. I finally stood up to him…..we didn’t fight but I think I gave him a right-good verbal whipping in front of all his thugs.
5.) No, as I never imagined myself in any one job and as a consequence had all sorts of ideas about what adulthood would be like. I do have to say that my lab research job gig was pretty sweet. Sort of like Pamela, I’d roll into work “around” 9, dressed in flip-flops, shorts and a tee shirt, work a few hours while having about 3 chat windows going, have a 2 hour boozy lunch with Reid and return to “work”. The rest of the day was punctuated with un-fettered access to the internet. Freakin’ sweet.
1. My main complaint of late is drivers. As in why Denver seems to be hosting Whack-a-Pedestrian competitions. (I walk to work so this is a rather frightening epidemic to me)
2. I think it was Reid complimenting me on my bizarro (yet creative) dinner last night.
3. Fast hands. Think of all the mayhem that could be caused (and cash stolen) with none the wiser.
4. In pre-school, it was me. I was suspended twice. Later schoolyards…I can’t recall.
5. I imagined myself as a zoologist a la Jane Goodall, so no…not where I thought I’d be.
1)I had a crazy crack head at work tell me I was not very nice to her. Duh!
2) I had a family bring cookies by the station because Dad can still walk and feed himself after the rapid recognition of his stroke and even quicker ride we gave him to the hospital.
3)Fast hands + porn = YAHOOO!!!
4)It is always good to find the biggest kid and kick his ass, or become someones bitch the first day. So I had lots of bitches!!
5)There is a photo of me when I was 3 in my mom’s arms watching the firefighters across the street, I am wearing my play fire helmet. I now have a real fire helmet and think most firefighters are douche bags.