1. It has been a tedious week. What is your best advice to overcome self pity.
I will generally begin by making fun of you. Nothing makes me feel better, when I am down and out, than to make you cry. I am not a nice person.
2. What is your favorite Trivial Pursuit category (real or imagined.)
Real – Arts and Leisure. Imagined – Inside Roy’s head.
3. Would you rather turn into Sammy Davis, Jr. when masturbating – or-
have the AOL “You’ve got mail” guy announce your ejaculations?
If it means being a part of the rat pack for a couple of times each day, bring on Sammy. (there is a great joke, within the joke there. See if you can find it.)
4. What do you remember about your first day of school?
I remember smiling and of course napping. This question brings back two memories, that of the first day of kindergarten – I am quite certain my fav memory from that day is the discovery of the cute little storage bins for hats, coats and fun little kindergarten gluey things. The second memory that this question triggers is the first day of first grade – and my fascination with the desk and the school supplies we were told to bring with us.
5. When was the last time you sat on a park bench? Describe the event.
I went to the museum on Monday, only to discover that the museum was closed on Mondays. While traveling back to the light rail, I walked through Civic Center park, which had many park benches. However there were also a lot of drug dealers and crack heads, so I made haste in my dash and passed up the chance to sit on a park bench and complain about my sciatica.