thisiswhatyoushalldo

Friday Fives

1. Where are you right now? Weather? Temperature?.
At work in the Inverness Tech Center in beautiful scenic Englewood, CO. Snowing and rain. 30 degrees.

2. What have you lost recently? What were the consequences?
The most recent “lost” item, as in never to be seen again, is a pair of glasses. I had them in a case and was walking to my car. They were my spare pair while my “good” lenses were getting fixed at the opticians. I ended up having to wear an old pair for about a week. Kind of a bummer. The glasses were an old prescription but the sunglasses were a current prescription and it was a bit tiring on the eyes.

3. What was the first CD you ever purchased? Does that embarrass you now?
The first CD was “Born In The USA by Bruce Springsteen. Followed a replacement CD, “Synchronicity” by The Police.

4. Fountain or Ball Point?
Pilot P-700 .07 Ink Gell rolling writer. A great, great pen and cheap. You can usually buy a dozen or so at Office Max or Costco for about 4 bucks.

5. Crest or Colgate?
Crest. Although I recently switched to the Crest orange flavored toothpaste. It is disappointing. Sure, it tastes great but it doesn’t have that “slap-your-ass-and-wake-up” effect of traditional flavored toothpaste.

via Friday Fives.

Friday Fives

1. What do you do for a living?
I am a “Fraud Specialist” at Nextel. Basically, I look at a few accounts everyday and determine if they were set up using fraudulent credit. I basically follow our sales force around the database and undue what they have done because they are working so hard to get a commission that they cut corners. But I also work on issues of identity theft and account hijacking and adjust charges/deactivate accounts were invalid charges have occurred.

2. What do you like most about your job?
I am generally do a good thing and am actually contributing to some good in the world. It is a laid back department with smart people and a very generous corporation.

3. What do you like least about your job?
When I close one of our tickets wrong, I know I will get dinged the next day and it irritates me that I can let little things like that slip by.

4. When you have a bad day at work it’s usually because _____…
I am unable to fulfill God’s glory and message while pinned in my cube.

5. What other career(s) are you interested in?
Porn. *

*(see the dichotomy between 4 and 5? That is a joke, you see. We built the foundation in the joke in number 4 when I made up the crap about Jesus and then slammed the joke home, (in the humor parlance, “the hammer”) by going the other way – again in the world of humor writing a misdirection – by tossing in the porn reference.)

via Friday Fives.

Friday Fives

1. What’s your favorite animal?
It used to be dogs. And it used to be a Scottish terrier, most importantly, Whiskey, the wonder dog, the most brilliant and talented dog that ever lived. If I ever get an other dog, it will probably be a Scotty. But a few year’s back, a few very dear friends got me a cat. Brando, the wonder cat, the most brilliant and talented cat that ever lived. Cats are certainly moving up on my list. However not just any cat. Brando, the wonder cat, the most brilliant and talented cat that ever lived is a very cool, suave cat. He is part puppy and part puma. Some cats, they just swing that way, babe.

2. What pets have you had in your lifetime?
Well, there are the two listed above, primarily. Family pets included a Spitz dog named Gigi. And there was a Rat terrier named Abigail and my sister’s first dog, Molly, a dim brained Labrador/Golden Retriever mix. There was Mom’s cat, Olivia. And another family dog, Rudy that I barely remember at all. Dad was a sucker for stray dogs and was known to bring a few home from time to time until an owner could be found.

3. Is there any specific pet that you’ve wanted but never had? Why?
Monkey! Need I say more. We used to have a cousin who lived in Denver and he was famous to us as children because he had a pet chimp. That’s right a chimpanzee – and part of the family. Honestly, I would dig having a chimp. I also want a real tall and smart standard poodle. They are cool dogs.

4. Are you allergic to any animals?
I am pretty sure I am allergic to gerbils/hamsters. I had a roommate in college who had a gerbil/hamster (Is there really any difference) And that was only time I broke out, head to toe in hives and was painfully sick with an allergic reaction. I am certain it was those vermin pets.

5. Do you have any ‘pet’ pet peeves (your pets or others’)?
Not using your signal in traffic, primary pet peeve. Having a set opinion and unwavering in the ability to change your mood/opinion – pet peeve number two. Rats, snakes, gerbil/hamster/chinchilla/guinea pigs, most birds, ferrets/minks, pigs – these are not pets and in most case they would be soup. Pet peeve three: Owning any of the above animals and calling them pets. It ain’t right.

via Friday Fives.

Friday Fives

1. What was your first job?
I was a diswasher/dining room buser at an old folks home. I was 15 years old and looking right into the eye of aging, alzheimer’s and death. As a first job it really grounded me. I would be playing checkers with some charming old man one day and come in to work the next and that same guy had a stroke the night before and was very much a changed man. I remember finding a set of teeth in the soup bowls and often had to break up a few fights at the table as the old folks would bicker with each other over the condiments.

2. How old were you when you had your first kiss?
The real kiss, with fireworks and everything I was 16 on a high school band trip one summer. We were in Portland, OR for their annual Rose Festival and I met a girl. The rest of the story has been related in thousands of teen angst rock songs.

3. What was your first car? What happened to it?
It was a family hand-me-down. A 1968 Ford Galaxy Custom 500 with a standard “three on the tree” transmission. Fun to drive. It was eventually passed on to some cousins as their childs’ first car – or something like that.

4. What was your first concert?
The Rolling Stones, 1981, Folsum Field, Boulder, Colorado, Tatoo You tour.

5. How do you plan to spend your weekend?
A movie tonight and some beers with friends after work. Sunday is the weekly Soprano’s potluck and food/wine fest. Saturday is still wide open.

via Kevin.