The Friday Fives

Cancel Culture

1. If you had the power to shut down a company for good, which company would it be?

Monsanto. A huge food conglomerate plays the game with severe trickery – GMOs, chemicals, and poisons. They indeed suck.

2. If you could ban one song from the airwaves, what would it be?

I have discussed McCartney’s “Wonderful Christmas Time,” but is just a seasonal ditty – I’ll allow it and reserve the right to change the channel instead. I am sure some highly offensive rap/hip-hop out there that I haven’t heard would certainly offend my small-town boy senses. but in the zone/genre I tend to rock to, which is classic /alternative rock, should that song just be banned?

“Indiana Wants Me,” Not because it is necessarily offensive but really just a stupid song. An entire state is chasing this guy across the country, and he is stopping to tell some girl he loves her. – get those priorities in order, dude.

3. If you could cancel one television show or moment from the airwaves, what would it be?

The Housewives genre of reality TV. I have watched exactly 15 minutes of one of those programs, and yes, had I the ability to cancel, I indeed would.

4. What movie should just not exist?

I am not a big horror movie fan, and that would be just fine if any of those were to disappear forever. I know I am generally in the minority here, but so be it – be gone, spook fest!

5. What typical American behavior should be banned outright?

The huge, huge, huge collections of guns. Go to the rural hinterlands of the fine nation, and many of the folks in those parts have these huge gun collections, which are just so unnecessary and stupid. There are about three guns for each person in the nation, but well over half the country doesn’t even own one. I am not anti-gun. Sure, go get yourself a rifle or a pistol, whatever. But do you really need five of of them? Six? Sever? dial it down a notch, there, Jethro

The Friday Fives

1. What song is your soundtrack of the 1980s

“Man Out of Time” by Elvis Costello. I listened to lots and lots of Elvis in the ’80s. I was way into Elvis before Springsteen, even.

2. What song is your soundtrack of the 1990s

“I Am Trying To Break Your Heart” by Wilco Wilco spun around my brain a lot in the 1990s, more perhaps than Springsteen.

3. What song is your soundtrack of the 2000s

“The Wish” by Bruce Springsteen. Technically, the “Tracks” box set came out in 1999, but I didn’t buy it until 2000, and it reignited my Springsteen love for many, many years. He is the poet and spirit of everyman.

4. What song is your soundtrack of the 2010s

“The ’59 Sound” – The Gaslight Anthem. In the 2010s, I joined Pandora and then Spotify, and through those music streamers discovered a lot of different music.

5. What song is your soundtrack of your life, year to date?

“Zip a Dee Doh Day” = by James Baskett from the film “Song Of The South” (A terrible film but a great soundtrack). Life has generally been good for me, and this song is about being happy.

The Friday Fives

1. If you could create a new Muppet who/what would it be?

A baby octopus wearing socks as mittens. I have a t-shirt that looks like this and thought, “That cute lil’ thing would be a great muppet.

2. What movie would you watch a scene-for-scene Muppet remake of?

Star Wars with Grover as Darth Vader and Big Bird as Chewie

3. If Kermit the Frog came up to you while visiting the zoo and asks you to smoke a joint with him, what happens next?

Oh, I’d totally smoke with Kermit at the park and spend the afternoon watching the monkeys with him.

4. Which Muppet are you?

The previously mentioned Grover. The Er-Elmo

5. Peaceful aliens make contact with Earth. They invite only one noteworthy person who will represent humanity. Which Muppet would you send to represent Earth?

Kermit seems like this obvious answer, but Link Hogthrob, the captain of Swinetrek, would be the go-to muppet to initiate first contact.

The Friday Fives

1. Who was the best drunk/alcoholic character in a TV show/Movie?

Dudley Moore as Arthur. Hands down

2. You go up to a bartender and tell him: “Make me a 2022”. What drink does he make?

A Negroni.

(I recently had one of these newly hip cocktails, and it is delightful. )

The classic Negroni:

1 ounce gin
1 ounce sweet vermouth
1 ounce Campari
Orange twist or slice for garnish

Place ice, gin, sweet vermouth, and Campari in a shaker and give a good shake for 10 – 20 seconds and pour into a rocks glass and garnish with the orange twist.

3. What is your favorite holiday season cocktail?

An ice-cold gin martini with a stuffed olive.

4. Do you have a fancy show-off cocktail?

See above. When done correctly, there is a very, very thick layer of ice on top, and the cocktail glass becomes frosted. (Shaken, not stirred to get it especially cold. )
7 parts gin to one short part of dry vermouth and a 30- 45 second shake.

5. What is the best drunk/alcoholic/booze-themed song?

Bloody Mary Morning by Willie Nelson but best covered by the Yonder Mountain String Band.

The Friday Fives

1. What’s an album/music you couldn’t live without?

Mandy Patinkin. Sometimes I just need to hear “Somewhere Over The Rainbow.”

2. You’re starting a band in the morning. What’s your band name?

Coffee burst

3. What song has just a terrific start to it?

Van Morrison’s Domino

4. Without naming it, what’s special about the city you’re in?

Casa Bonita (reopening soon?)

5. What’s something you memorized in school that you still remember today?

The Pledge of Allegiance. I haven’t recited it in decades, but I can totally do it from rote to this day.