The Friday Fives

1. The porn industry wants to start turning historical events into adult films, what are some of the titles they come up with?

The Gettysberg Undress

Enola’s Gay

Homoroe Doctrine

Water-Sports-Loo

2.It is November 4th, 2020. You wake up and turn on your TV while eating breakfast to see your face plastered all over the news. Somehow you have won the Presidential Election by majority vote. What is the first thing you do?

Impeach Reality Television

3. You have 5 minutes to live. What song do you go out to?

Tough one.   Sure there is my classic Friday afternoon leaving work song: Springsteen’s “Rosalite.”  Maybe Sid Vicious’s “My Way.” But I think u will go with Jello Biafra’s “Are You Drinking With Me, Jesus”

4. What questions should you NEVER ask at the end of a job interview?

Wanna see my cock?

Can I take the conference calls from a stall in the john?

What are your office policies on wearing pants?

5. What do you use the little pocket on your jeans for?

I have this little cool bluetooth reciever that lets you plug in decent wired headphones into and connect to you phone making any headphones bluetooth wireless.  It fits into the watch pocket perfectly.

One Reply to “The Friday Fives”

  1. 1) Star spangled boner
    The immense penis proclamation
    The revolutionary whore

    2) Overturn citizens united.

    3) Imperial March

    4) Do you press charges?
    Can I get an advance on my first pay check?
    What did you hire me to do?

    5) I haven’t worn jeans in over three years, so umm dunno.

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