The Friday Fives

1. What is the most disturbing thing you’ve heard said casually?

There was this click of folks running around together working in the fraud department where I worked. They were involved in a sex club/cult, and the unfiltered stories they told were quite disturbing. I am not a prude, but their stories usually leave my mouth agape.

2. You go to bed like normal, but when you wake up you’re in a hospital 200 years later, and you haven’t physically aged a day. What’s the first thing you ask?

Did the Broncos win.?

3. What TV show never gets old to you?

I still tune into Friends reruns and the Star Trek franchise.

4. What is the worst movie you have ever seen?

Leviathan is a really bad knockoff of The Abyss. There are many others, certainly, but I walked out of the theater on this one. So Bad

5. What movie would never be made nowadays?

Blazing Saddles

The Friday Fives

1. What’s an innocuous word that sounds ridiculously sexual?

Well I go with the obvious one: MOIST.

2. What is your best weight loss tip?

Trulicity. Just one shot a week and you forget to even eat much less eat less.

3. What was younger you hilariously wrong about, like completely missed the mark on that one?

I was on my 30s when I realized that Holland and The Netherlands were the same country (And I lived in Germany for a bit so I should have known better.)

4. What is a ‘strange’ food from your culture that outsiders often find bizarre, but you think everyone should try at least once?

I grew up living in a border city next to the foreign land of Utah and we always seemed to have at any gathering of food, family and friends some sort of Jello salad – a stple in the Utah culture that bled into to Craig due to the Mormon population. ( I still kind of have an affinity for Peach Jello with spiced peaches and cottage cheese as a side dish.)

5. What is the most extreme temperature you have experienced?

32 degrees below zero – with wind and snow. Craig is one fucking cold place.

The Friday Fives

1. What is the worst situation to sneeze in?

Giving a State Of The Union Address

2. Who is your guilty celebrity crush?

Currently, it is Richard Ayoede. He is hilarious.

3. What is the most ridiculous lie you’ve ever heard?

“It was a perfect call!” Donald Trump

4. If you could take any TV show character and put them in a zombie apocalypse show, who would it be?

Rob Petrie from the Dick Van Dyke show

5. What are the hobbies that is a immediate red flag?

Ammo reloading in the basement

The Friday Fives

1. What is your favorite smell?

The Cherry Blend pipe tobacco that my dad used to smoke. I have found a few candles with this smell and I always snap those up at the store when I find them.

2. What is your catchphrase?

Probably “Living The Dream”, spoken with a smidge of sarcasm. I have caught myself saying it a lot and an employee once gave me a key chain fob that has the phrase emblazoned on it.

3. What is the movie/TV show that you totally love but nobody else around you seems to know/like it?

On The Acorn streaming service, I am quite fond of “The Detectorists” a slow comedy about two blokes who scour the countryside with their metal detectors looking for old English war relics.

4. What is a hobby you’ve picked up recently and why did you start it?

I started studying French with the DuoLingo app. I took French for two semesters in college but have forgotten most of it. It is pretty fun.

5. What is something wonderful that happened to you today?

My cold is getting much much better. I was knocked on my ass this week with an ear infection.

Also, my car got stolen but that is not the question – I think I just needed to say that out loud.

The Friday Fives

1. What is a loved band from your past you just don’t care for?

Van Halen. I know that is heresy. I listen to Classic Rewind on SiriusXM just about all day long and hear the soundtrack of my 1970s and 1980s high school days – but they play VH and then Hagar about every 45 minutes, and they are just so overplayed.

2. What is your favorite music genre?

This is a very difficult question. Maybe it is my ADHD, but I generally bounce around genres as the mood hits me. But I think old-school blues and roots rock is where I tend to land.

3. What is the best cover version of a song?

“Twist and Shout” by the Beatles, covering the Isley Brothers. (Although the Isley Brothers also a cover version, they significantly reworked it, and their version was considered the best version – at least until the Beatles.)

Also, honorable mention – Johnny Cash’s cover of Kris Kristofferson’s Sunday Mornin’ Comin’ Down.

4. What is the worst cover version of a song?

This is probably a cheat answer, but any cover version of a song from Fleetwood Mac’s “Rumors” is going to be inferior. Just don’t. (I generally enjoy cover songs and the attempt to find new life and visions for a song, and I appreciate the artistic license.

5. So, folks, what’s new for you so far in 2023?

Just weighed myself this a.m. and I came in at 199. When I was 19 years old and joined the army, I weighed 209, so I think I am doing ok – I weigh less than I did nearly 40 years ago.