1. Your goal is to give someone a crippling fear of oranges. How do you succeed?
Well, first I would start with a bigger than life size poster of Donald Trump, who, as you know, is orange. Then a video barage of scary images featuring the orange skinned Ompaloompas. From there I would feed a ton of oranges to you until you throw up and the combination of all those visceral bad memories of orange would instil a great fear.
Either that or hypnosis.
2. Would your rather have the scorching heat of summer of the Arctic-tinged air of winter?
I am going to punt and vote for Autumn, my favorite season. I like the smell, the colors of the trees and shades of the sky in the fall.
3. Prometheus gave us fire? What should be another gifts from the Gods to render unto mankind.
Hmm, it would have to be something everyone can use. So a magic power, like the ability to roll back time wouldn’t work because if everyone had that power, there would be nothing getting done with a whole planet of do overs. I suggest the abilty to fly. Boom, transportation, energy and global warming problems are solved.
4. The ice cream truck has changed its enticing song. Now it plays [blank]_______.
There is nothing more annoying than the repetitive sounds of the ice cream truck. I think, to stay in that vein, we make the sound pay for itself by offering up the truck as an advertisement.
So on constant repeat I present the paid advertisement for Kars 4 Kids
1-800 KARS4Kids, K-A-R-S , Kars for Kids – over and over and over and over.
5. You discover a diary with only one entry containing the answer to the mystery of life. It says [blank] _____.
Two words: Raspberry Newtons.
(I don’t think I need to explain that any further, pretty self explanatory.)